We are all struggling. Situations can be uptight, suffocating or depressing.
Many of us want to be heard yet we listen less. We want people to understand yet we understand less. Basically listening has lost its moral.
I have always seen myself as a multifaceted soul. And, since I started actively and intentionally working on defining my identity, I made it my purpose to assure that’s true. The greatest part of it all being able to tell great stories, ink each word of poetry created from emotions and of course tell it like it is.Rutendo
Many people tend to lose focus on whom they can become and try fit in this box of believing what other people say. They linger and tolerate that negative energy taming it with love in a way that then creates who they become. This leads to locked up potential and capabilities allowing game changers to grow comfort in the safe zone instead of reaching out.
How about we all take a few minutes of time out from the people around us and listen. For once not to them but to yourself. What do you want? What’s your purpose? Do you think the voices that have silenced have had an impact on your mental health? Are you okay? Etc.
It will not matter now or tomorrow but it always catches up with you. Those words people say and the words you tell yourself build emotions that create a certain perception of the world around you. If you cannot acknowledge your emotions, thoughts and feelings then you are likely to be of harm to the people around you or yourself.
This is why you need to listen to you before you bring words out and create an affirmation. Once you can acknowledge your emotions and listen to yourself then you can empower. Listening develops you and allows you to grow.
So how do you listen?
1. Dealing with your emotions
There is not a moment in life one hates to be told they are wrong when they have a concrete foundation on a thought. It brews defence that leads to bitterness, resentment, discomfort and anger.
It’s not a new or strange feeling among egoistic people. Try to find healing the problem is not with somebody telling you the thought sucks. It’s with the judgement of wanting to be better. Keeping an open mind allows you realize there is more to this world than we can consume. Breathe and try listening to what you want to say before you say it.
Get rid of any distractions, never multi tasks in heart to heart conversations. It creates a safe space and comfortable environment for both the speaker and listener.
3. Fight the urge to interrupt
If you are going to be a better listener, maintain focus on the conversation. Whether it’s personal or a dialogue. Put effort to avoid constant conflict with the matter at hand. Pending matters are best attended to before they rot and stink. In as much as you might be in need of asking questions and clarifications, avoid defence or inserting thoughts in an incomplete thought.
4. Listen to learn
Try and look at every conversation as a lesson. Listen to your communicator so that you can pause to process the important response
5. Do not look at every conversation as a secret battle.
Just listen! Keep an open mind. Acknowledge their words and learn to embrace that people differ. It’s normal.
To become an improved listener is crucial. Start by listening to yourself. Foster better skills, emotions, and perspectives maybe the world isn’t a bad place as it may seem.